5 Things To Love And 4 Things To Hate About Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom
I warned you!
It’s a good popcorn movie but there’s a LOT to hate about it.
My pet peeves:
1. It would have been 1000 times better if they’d bothered to run it by a Volcanologist and a Vet – so many things pulled me out of the movie and made me say “Bullshit” or “Puleese! Don’t you know things?” I don’t know much but I do know that pulling a bullet out of someone’s leg doesn’t save their life, stopping the BLEEDING does. Don’t even get me started on the whole Dino blood transfusion business! And I know lava contacting water makes water HOT, like BOILING hot, and yet at no time is the water or anything that comes into contact for that matter realistically hot; especially no notice of how hot it is when it’s barely inches away from the skin of humans!
2. Oh! An ACTUAL animal behaviourist would have been useful too because animals that are fleeing for their lives don’t stop to eat things!!! Seriously, in fact, animals running for their lives or fighting for survival usually throw up any food they’d recently eaten so that they’re not trying to digest while the flight mechanism is activated. It’s automatic response. Don’t stop to eat the tourists when you’re fleeing from a volcano or toxic gas.
3. Yes, it’s fun to do callbacks on prior movies, 2 or 3 callbacks add homage but seriously, enough already, we get it. There were other movies. They had fun bits. This movie does not need to be a camera clipart of stills we’ve already seen.
4. The timing is ALLLLLL over the place. Pacing is terrible! I’m a story development editor so I can’t help noticing these things. And I actually clock checked when they left the island and had a sinking feeling because as I’d suspected prior to clock checking they were running seriously late which meant either the mainland stuff wouldn’t get paid off as well as it should or it would be rushed (ended up letting down on both counts).
Okay, so those are the top of my list. There were other things I didn’t like but it was those things that “ruined” the movie for me. Fix those things and I’d have really, really loved it.
But, since it is a good popcorn movie I’ll leave you with things I did enjoy:
1. The relationship between Claire and Owen was relatively well paced. It could have had more development but the two characters clicked together well, there was good balance between the two, and as a unit they work, as a dysfunctional unit they still work. I liked that Claire’s character really shone in this one. In fact I think she shone even better than Owen.
2. I loved the Blue and Owen developments. LOVED the relationship and clear “love” between them, especially the video logs that show that bond forging and really highlight exactly how unique and special Blue is.
3. I LOVED the Maisy twist. I enjoyed the mystery behind her and spent some good brain time trying to work out who could have been her mother. So when the reveal came (a little heavy handed and not quite emotionally paid off as it could have been but still…) it was an intriguing one that gave a nice “Ah ha!” and was believable and really gives a good “what will they do next?”ness to the end of the movie.
4. I loved the scene where Maisy makes a critical choice because seconds before it Claire making the other choice made my brain instantly ask, “If you make that choice what does it mean for Maisy?” So I LOVED that she stepped up – and of course that it leads into another movie since even though there was lots I didn’t like about this one I still love the franchise and hope the next one will be good.
5. The CGI was absolutely awesome. There was some truly cinematic quality images in it and I think it’s award worthy cinematography. The shot with the bronto backdropped with lava and smoke was epic. Many of the mosasaurus shots were great. And most of the CGI was flawless, particularly the dinosaurs (In fact, the CGI made some of the set design look terrible – the scene where Owen is walking through the jungle tracking Blue for example made me very conscious that he was walking on a set not in a real jungle – but for set design the castle/mansion/house thing was STUNNING!).
Okay, so I’ll stop ranting and spoiling it for you. As you can imagine, I went in with high hopes and lots of excitment which contributes to how disappointed some things made me. BUT I still think it’s a good movie and I did enjoy myself and I will watch it again and buy it to add to my collection and watch no. 6 when it comes out. I do recommend watching it, but go in for the fun of a popcorn flick and be prepared to work a bit harder than you should have to on the suspension of disbelief.
Oh! I should add that the WRITING was awesome. The story was plausible and the arcs of the story were great. I think most (if not all) of the faults I found with the movie belong at the feet of the director.
My friend Julz asked, “I heard it was a great story for kids?”
Yeah, kids would probably overlook or not realise most of the movies failings. And it’s not as scary as the trailer made it seem (there’s a scene in the trailer of the dinosaur in a kids bedroom leaning over her while she’s cowering under the covers – that part of the trailer made my son decide he didn’t want to watch it because it would be too scary) And honestly, that scene is maybe two minutes of screen time. There are a few high intensity (aka fun scary) scenes and LOTS of action that would definitely make it fun for kids. Although, having said that, there’s a lot of “weight” in the questions the story asks us to think about which would go completely over the heads of kids. I don’t think that would spoil it for them though.
You know I never thought about it before but there is a MASSIVE plot hole in Jurassic World. What business gets so far in production as to have a product ready to market and THEN seeks out sponsors to pay for it? And in the case of Jurassic World as if they don’t have a wait list of sponsors keen and eager to have their name on the next attraction?
Even in a build it and they will come, the park itself is implied to have a fairly solid success rate. It’s not opening weekend. She talks about how “each time” they release a new attraction attendance spikes. Which implies they’ve done it a time or two to bring back numbers whenever the park starts to lose appeal to the general audience. In fact, the park is so well established that dinosaurs are no longer special in and of themselves which is why they had to up the anti (bigger, more teeth). And the whole “spare no expense” BS either implies the guy is insanely rich, bad with money, or the park is rolling in it so they don’t strictly need sponsorship; they must not have needed it to get the production of that animal along so far. And yet, if they DON’T need it, then why get sponsorship at all given even she complains about the sponsors potentially getting to name the dinosaurs in future, etc. etc. So, clearly they NEED sponsorships, and it seems like the kind of thing smart businesses would be chomping at the bit for. Although, of course, perhaps I’ve answered my own question above with the whole dinosaurs no longer special thing.
But, being a fictional business in a fictional movie in a fictional world, it doesn’t have to follow the laws of funding a business. They can run bad businesses by having infinite pockets (or run massively in debt – like the government does).